life hack: get a tattoo. if the people at the job interview notice it and look concerned, laugh a little and explain “it’s just temporary.” months later if your boss asks why you lied and said it was a temporary tattoo, stare off into the distance and whisper with a tremulous voice the poor excuse for truth your subconscious has been fighting for its entire insignificant existence: “everything is temporary.”
How to get a boyfriend
Happy 23rd Birthday Dylan O’Brien! (August 26th, 1991)
i have 3 moods for characters:
- the ruler of my heart please step on me
- precious child must be protected at all costs
- complete trash yet ironically my favorite character
when someone repeats a joke you just said and they get the credit for it
Floozies and Fools
i was talking to my friend about the similarities between gryffindor and slytherin, and he told me to come up with a concise way to explain the differences between the two.
so i told him, “if you make a gryffindor mad and they storm out on you, they’ll get a lot of satisfaction out of slamming the door behind them. but a slytherin will leave it wide open, because they’ll get the most satisfaction knowing they made you get up to close it.”
boys still call girls weak but many girls voluntarily pull parts of their own eyebrows off their faces by sheer force on a regular basis who the hell do they think they’re calling weak
#dont even get me started on bikini waxing
dealing with boys.